Seriously. Nobody cares. Except you, and maybe other mom’s who are your “type”. Nobody cares if you’re a helicopter parent, a crunchy parent, a free-range parent, an attachment parent, a “sancti”parent, or as the mom groups like to say a “shit mom”.
Who the hell decided to name parental choices anyway? From a psychological standpoint, I understand. Your brain is constantly trying to form connections to better understand things. Grouping into categories helps you recognize information faster, and I do get that. BUT: I find it increasingly annoying when I log on to ANY social media platform and people are proclaiming “I’m a crunchy mom!” while showing off their new “crunchy parent” bumper sticker. WHAT IN THE HELL do we bumper stickers to proclaim what kind of parent we are? Are we really that self centered that EVERYONE you drive by needs to know that you extend rear face, breastfeed, and baby wear? Seriously?
And speaking of baby wearing, it’s really not even enough to just baby wear these days. You have to have the most expensive carrier, or you’re doing it wrong. That’s basically what I get out of the mom groups I’m in. It makes me wonder what we did hundreds of years ago when a baby carrier was made out of a freshly slaughtered deer, but I digress.
ANYWAY, what I really want to know is why are we so OBSESSED with the labels? Why did we even make the labels? Helicopter parents may have anxiety. They’re around their toddler at the park the whole time because they don’t want their child to be injured. Who can’t understand that logic? Free-range parents want their children to grow up to be independent thinkers. I can understand that, too. I can understand attachment parenting, because who really wants to stop cuddling their baby? When you stop with the labeling for 45 seconds, the bottom line is the same: everyone is just trying to do the best with what they have. We all love our children. We all want them to be successful and bright.
What we need to understand is that not everyone is going to parent the same way, and that’s OKAY. If you read baby books, which we ALL have at one point, parenting techniques and what is recommended changes every few years. What was considered the BEST for your first baby, may not be by the time you have your second. Every parenting type has some “research” that backs its claims, and that’s all well and good. My problem stems from our inability to be respectful towards one another about our personal parental choices. As long as a child is not being harmed, nor is the choice harming anyone else’s child then the choice should matter little to others.
We all want great things from our children, but that starts with us. We need to be the example for respect, love, and compassion. We need to SHOW our children that not everyone will have the same beliefs and experiences, but that’s okay because that’s part of being human. That’s part of being ALIVE. The world needs a generation of children far greater and more open than we have become, and it starts with us. It starts with love.